MAN: Own Your Identity

MAN: Own Your Identity

– All right, it’s Pastor Mark here, welcoming you to join me for “Real Men” Wednesday nights, live here at Trinity Church in Scottsdale or online at We’ll try and post it elsewhere, but they’re gonna ban me because I’m in the middle of a special sermon series called “Act Like a Man”. If you are offended by that, you need to watch it twice because you need a lot of work. In each sermon, I’ll go through the reasons why God made men, why it’s good to be a man, and how to be a man that is a blessing to women and children like Jesus Christ, the God-man, who is our perfect example. This is gonna be a fun time. It’s gonna be super theological, super practical, and, as always, you’ll get a bit of comedy. So dudes, grab a Bible, grab a notebook, put your belt on, show up, get it together. See you on Wednesday. It’s time. It’s time to build the men up to bless women and children. Amen.

– Amen.

– We live in a world that is broken, confused, flawed. Everyone in everything has lied to you. It has discouraged you. It has confused you and we’re here to serve you. We’re here to bless you. We’re here to help you because you matter. If you’re married, your wife matters and your marriage matters. If you’re a dad, your family and your children matter. If you’re a business owner, your company matters. If you’re a ministry leader, your ministry matters. If you’re a grandfather, your legacy matters. And for you young guys, we’re especially glad to see you. We’re gonna help you not screw up generations of your entire family. Amen.

– Amen.

– That’s why we’re here.

– [Congregation] Whoa! My name is Pastor Mark. I’m really honored to have each of you. And I mean that with all sincerity. And I’m gonna do a special series of talks I’m gonna call “Act Like a Man” and we’re calling it “Real Men 101”. And so this is the first talk and it is “Man: How To Own Your Identity”. And so we’re gonna meet every Wednesday night, here at Trinity Church. You’re all welcome. For those who are joining us live online, we’re glad to have you. When they ban me, you can find this talk at And I’m one strike away from a permanent, forever removal from TikTok. So I hope tonight is that magical night. Because TikTok is not where the real men are. Men don’t tick or tok, that’s not team. So what I wanna talk about ultimately is this, what is a man? Why did God make you a man? And what does God have for you as a man? And this is a global conversation in crisis, including like the recent documentary, “What is a Woman”, which is a great question. I wish they would do a follow up, “What is a man?” We’re gonna answer that question. And I’ll show you how, I’ll tell you how screwed up the world is. Buddy of mine he’s a pastor, his men in his church came to him recently, very angry, it was the first day of school, these dads who love Jesus and their kids take their responsibility seriously, they take their kids to the local public school, and when you used to go to school or drop your kids off, what was usually at the head of your desk? Your name tag. And now these dads saw in elementary school, starting in kindergarten, a rainbow with a sliding scale for gender spectrum.

And so each kid every day gets to decide what their gender is for the day. And then the other children are supposed to go around and figure out what everyone’s gender is for the day, and then appropriately speak to them according to their gender pronoun. The point is this, we’re no longer even identifying people by their name or by their God-given gender. Instead, we’re allowing people who are way too young to make any important decisions. Let me just say this. If much of your diet still includes crayons and glue, you’re not ready to make major life decisions. But you are dealing with it and we’re dealing with it. And we deal with this in our day, where if you are a man, they call that masculinity toxic. And the problem in our day is not toxic masculinity, it’s the complete lack of masculinity from the White House to the outhouse. From top to bottom, we’re lacking strong, healthy, godly, vibrant, capable, confident, courageous male leadership.

– The world has a lot of problems and the solution starts with the men. So it’s an honor to have you. And let me talk first about gender, sex, gender and sexuality, and the way we got into this total cultural disaster, this sociological experiment that is failing miserably and how we got to this place. Your sex, if you’re under 25 or went to college, just hold your chair ’cause you’re gonna implode. So sex is, it’s how many categories?

– [Congregation] Two.

– Two: male, female. Crazy, I know. We’re probably already done on the internet. And that’s, probably, all it took.

– Sex is male and female binary gender categories, and this is your biological status. This is chosen by God, not by you.

– [Congregation] That’s right.

– It’s chosen by God, not by you. Some of you guys may be very confused. You say, “How do I know?” Well…

– If you have a mirror . Anyways, your sex chromosomes, your gonads, your internal reproductive organs, your external genitalia. Now the truth is, there are some babies born and their sex is unclear. That’s .1 to .2% have ambiguous external genitalia. 1 to 2% have lesser ambiguous, but some confusion of their biological sex at birth. Gender, crazy, sex and gender go together, gender is supposed to flow from sex. So men are supposed to be?

– Masculine.
– Masculine. Women are supposed to be? – Feminine.

– Feminine. We used to know this before we got educated beyond our intelligence. And the way it would work, how many of you are older men, and when the child was born, they’d say, it’s a?

– Boy.

– It’s a boy. Or it’s a?

– Girl.

– Now they say it’ll determine in third grade. And we used to wrap the baby in a blue blanket for a?

– Boy
– A boy. And a pink blanket for a? – Girl.
– Girl.

– Now we put the baby in a rainbow blanket and, you know, demons attack it, and we hope it works out. And so that’s where we find ourselves, total confusion. Sex, gender, and then sexuality. So men should be sexually attracted to?

– Women.
– Women. I’m giving you boys a layup here, it’s easy, okay. And women should be attracted to? – Men

– Men. Sex, gender, sexuality. God determines your sex. Gender flows from the God-determined sex. And then sexuality is attraction toward the opposite sex. True or false? That’s not the world we live in.

– Here’s the Word versus the world. And let me say this. The battle is always between what the world says and what the Word says. Let me just make this very clear. There is nothing holding back the complete disillusion and destruction of Western culture other than the Word of God. The only thing left that provides sanity, some sense of order and law, and rule for human life, and flourishing is the Word of God. But there is a constant conflict between the world and the Word. On the Word sex is fixed binary. We’re gonna talk about this: male, female. Gender is fixed binary: masculine, feminine. Sexuality is fixed: one man and one woman in the covenant context of consummated marriage. That’s the Word? Here’s the world. Sex: it’s fluid on an intersex spectrum. Well, today I might feel different than I do tomorrow. So my sex is not

determined by God, it’s determined by me. It’s not fixed, it’s static, and it’s not binary, it’s on a spectrum. Gender is fluid on an unfixed spectrum. One day you feel masculine the next day you feel feminine, the next day you’re somewhere in the middle. And then lastly, sexuality is fluid on an unfixed spectrum. Today, I’m attracted to this person, tomorrow I’m attracted to that person. My sex identity, my gender proclivity, my sexual reality are completely, continually moving targets, there’s no consistency. And you just need to know first and foremost, men, this is all driven by the porn industry. The more porn you watch, the more confused you are. You’ll be confused about sex, gender, and sexuality. We’re gonna talk about this as we get deeper into the talks, I’m gonna lay the foundational framework today, and then we’re gonna get into how this applies to marriage and sexuality and work and worship and all of life. But the entire goal of pornography is to literally re-hardwire the neural pathways in your brain so that you don’t understand sex, gender, and sexuality according to the Word, instead you’re corrupted according to the world. And the way this works now, it’s a whole secular cult called wokism. It’s a non-religious but highly spiritual cult that is overtaken Western culture, and woke is the opposite of being born again. Everything God creates Satan counterfeits. So in Christianity, you are born again, and in wokism you are awakened to see how you’re a victim, not a villain. How you’re a good person, not a bad person. How nothing in you needs to change, but everyone needs to change how they respond to you. And in Christianity, when you get saved and you’re born

again, then you get baptized. And the counterfeit of that in the woke culture is coming out of the closet. That’s their way of taking their private beliefs public, and no longer being ashamed of their behavior. That being said, everything I’m about to tell you is highly offensive.

– [Congregation] Whoa!
– Highly offensive, okay. And highly encouraging. – [Congregation] Yes it is.
– ‘Cause God made you as a man.
– [Congregation] That’s right.

– And He didn’t make a mistake making you as a man. And the answer is not to be less of a man, but to be more of a man like Jesus, that’s why we’re here. So I wanna appeal to that masculine dignity that God has placed within you and I wanna call it out. And so here’s what the Bible says. First of all, God made you a man. I’ll read Moses, before sins enters the world, “God created man,” that’s mankind, in the original Hebrew that word is Adam, it’s Adam. The whole human race is named after our father, Adam. When God wanted to start humanity, He started with a man. When He wanted to save humanity, He came as a man. If we have problems, we need the men to be part of the solution. “God created man in His own image.” Here’s the crazy binary sex categories, what are they gentlemen?

– Male and female.

– Male and female. Okay. Which one are you? – [Congregation] Male.

– If you don’t know, ask the guy next to you. Don’t whisper. God, so you are male. That’s who you are. That’s who God made you to be. Don’t apologize for what God did. Don’t apologize for what God said.

– [Congregation] That’s right.

– God made you a man. Then sinners the world and it’s echoed again. Well, are we still male and female? Yeah. Genesis 5:2: “Male and female He created them.” Now, some people will come along, especially the woke joke folk and the rainbow people, and they’re gonna come along and they’re gonna say, “Well, not Jesus, Jesus was a hippie. “He wore a dress. He’s vegetarian. “He’s a pacifist. He’s on our team. “Probably smoked weed. “You know, long hair kinda looks FM.” And so what they will think is that Jesus would never say anything that would be so offensive as male and female. Jesus does. Jesus quotes Genesis. I’ll read it to you twice. “From the beginning, God made them”?

– Male and female.

– Male and female. Jesus says, “Hey, we’re still staying with plan A.” There was no confusion. There was no spectrum until sin entered the world. But God doesn’t leave His original plan ’cause God got it right the first time. And then Jesus says again, “From the beginning of creation, “God made them male and female.” So what we see today is first and foremost, there is an attack on masculinity and femininity. And in particular, is there a heavier war waged against women or men, femininity or masculinity?

– Masculinity.

– 100% on the masculinity side. 100%. You guys know this. Watching TV, the butt of every joke is the husband or the father. You turn on a movie with your kids and the dad is the dumbest person in the storyline. You turn on the sitcom and the fool is always the husband and the father. You go to work and God forbid you choose the wrong pronoun you’re gonna get crucified and canceled. Send your kids to school and they brainwash them, and if you say something, you’re the problem. That’s the world we live in. And it shows up in stupid ways. And I know Jesus says, “Don’t say something stupid, “unless it’s stupid.” And this is stupid: transgender sports. It’s one example. We used to have male, female, and now we say there is no such thing as male, female, so now we have males competing in sports against females. True or false? That’s stupid. That’s stupid. People with degrees are like, “I’m confused.” Well, then you got the wrong degree. I mean, I talked about it when I was in Romans, there’s a dude, guy born a dude, goes into cage fighting, decides he feels like a woman, so he’s fighting women. First thing my dad told

me is, we don’t hit?
– Girls.
– Girls. I still think that’s a good idea. – [Congregation] Absolutely.

– So he is fighting a woman and he cracks her skull, and I talk about it online, and then he criticizes me. And I would fight back, but I don’t fight girls. So anyways. So what happens is if you eliminate these God-given categories, no longer are you able to deal with some sort of reality? Now we’ve got women being beat up by men in the name of equality. It’s the weird, bizarre world we live in. And this includes this eradication of gender and absolute assault on our children.

– Yes.
– It’s an assault. It’s a brainwashing, cult-like global phenomenon. – Yeah.

– It just truly is. And if you look at the LGBTQIA, there is a group that is trying very heavily to add an M to the lineup of the alphabet soup: minor-attracted persons. We used to call them pedophiles, but they’ve rebranded. Apparently Satan got a marketing firm and rebranded. Minor-attracted persons are adults who are attracted to children. They wanna add the M to the alphabet soup. And so we’re telling our children, “God didn’t make you a boy. “God didn’t make you a girl. “And if He did, maybe God made a mistake “and He sinned against you. “So you need to undo the error that God has done, “and you need to go explore your gender.” We’re here to say, “No, no, no. God tells us who we are. “God defines who we are. “We don’t define who we are. “God made us two categories: male, female. “First thing is, ‘Which category am I in?'” And as soon as I talk about men, here’s what always happens. Everybody’s like, “You hate women.” No, actually, married one, have two daughters. Actually I find women more enjoyable than men, to be totally honest with you. They smell better. They’re pleasant. They tend to be relational, and they don’t pick a lot of fights. So, you know, I’m not anti-woman. Just because I’m for men doesn’t mean I’m against women. We’re gonna talk about that. We’re here to build men up to bless women and children.

– [Congregation] Amen.

– But you need to know that this war is for your children, and it’s for the next generation. And so what we’re doing now, we are taking children, we’re saying you don’t have a sex, you’re not male or female. You don’t have a gender, you can be very confused. And then what we’re actually setting them up for is a lot of sexual experimentation as a child. In what universe does

an eight-year-old kid have a sexual identity? If a kid is eight and sexual, somebody has committed a crime.

– [Congregation] Yeah.

– That’s not education, that’s indoctrination. I read this from the Associated Press, came out this week. “The World Professional Association for Transgender Health.” Seriously, I thought about this, the initials are WTH, which is like, what the hell? And so “The World Professional Association for Transgender Health “said, hormones could be started for children “as early as age 14.” 14 years of age. If you feel like you were born the wrong sex, we’re now going to give you medication to start to assault your God-given body that hasn’t even finished puberty and is fully grown. Some of those prescriptions include the same chemicals that we give pedophiles for chemical castration to children as young as age 14. “Two years earlier than the group’s previous advice.” They keep dropping the age to mutilate the children. “And some surgeries done at age 15.” Let me ask you a question. Anybody here make a dumb decision at 15? At 15 you’re like, “We don’t trust them with a car, “but they can determine to mutilate their genitalia.” They can make an irreversible decision for the rest of their life. This is complete insanity, and they keep lowering the age. Goes on to say, “The international group includes “more than 3,000 doctors, social scientists “and others involved in transgender health issues.” What happens is, if you don’t believe in sex, gender, and sexuality, then people obviously get confused. And let me just speak a bit of compassion here. If you’ve been exposed to pornography, brainwashed with a bad education, or molested, or traumatized, or assaulted, you have confusion, that’s terrifying and traumatizing. But to not help people through that, but to encourage them to continue in that is not loving and helping someone, especially a child. Especially a child.

– Right.

– And it’s actually a medical diagnosis, it’s a psychological diagnosis, it’s called gender dysphoria. And that is that your body and your brain don’t agree. So your body is male, but your mind says your female or vice versa. Well, there are two options. We could treat the brain or we can change the body. And what we’ve decided is, we’re going to mutilate the body and we’re not able, and in some states it’s not even legal to counsel someone to maybe reconsider if their mind is incongruent with their body, if their mind needs to change. And we’re in this culture where if you are confused, the last thing we would ever tell anyone is, “Just practice self-control, maybe don’t be sexually active. “You you’re in a hard season or a difficult mindset, “just take a break.” I mean, the best life lived in the history of the planet is Jesus Christ and He left the planet as a virgin. And so what we have now, we have a culture that is ultimately being driven by sexuality and perversion. The result is that we reinvent gender and then we mutilate the body, the biological sex. I’ve got it on “Real Leaders” at, it’s just came out this month. It’s an interview with Dr. Michael Miller, who some of you know, he’s a good man. He was the head of plastic surgery at Ohio State University, decades ago. First day on the job, I think as a resident, first surgery he was assigned: transgender reassignment surgery. He couldn’t do it ’cause he’s a Christian. If the Great Physician made you a man, the physician has

no right to come in and mutilate your manhood. He ultimately had to leave his job because he wouldn’t perform these kinds of surgeries. And I interview him for about an hour, hour and a half, it’s an interesting interview. But what he says is, you can’t change someone’s sex. It’s physically, anatomically impossible. You can fake it. You can try and create genitalia that are of the opposite sex, but it’s not the same. There’s not the pleasure, there’s not the reproduction,
there’s not the natural function. You can pump a body full of testosterone or estrogen, but it’s still a male or female body. And so what we have now, we have a, we have an experiment that we’re undertaking on a whole generation of young people. But in this case, I would say, especially young men. They’re confused, they’re pressured, they’re culturally bullied, and they’re in harm’s way. And the result is, kids who walk in this path, it gets darker and darker. Mental health is higher, suicidal ideation is higher. And then some would say, “Well it’s because you guys don’t support them.” It’s like, “Well, I mean we have a whole month. “I don’t know what group you’re in, I don’t get a month.” I mean, we have St. Patrick’s Day, I’m Irish, we get one day, you drink green beer, pat a leprechaun, you know, I mean that that’s it. They get a month. I mean, you go to Target and every aisle is just preaching conversion to something other than God-given sex and gender and sexuality. At the end of the day, it may just be that people are hurting themselves. And if you really love them, you tell them that they’re hurting themselves, not because you hate them, but because you love them, and because someone else is lying to them. When you’re working in your God-given sex, gender and sexuality, you’re working according to God’s divine design and you’re not fighting gravity and trying to row upstream. You’re working with gravity and you’re flowing in God’s grace downstream. So point number one: God made you a?

– Man.

– Man. Number two: He wants you to act like a?

– Man.

– Man. Prove it to you. Deuteronomy 22:5 This verse is very interesting. “A woman must not put on?

– Men’s clothing.
– “Men’s clothing, “and a man must not wear”?
– Women’s clothing.
– “Women’s clothing.” And all the men said?
– Amen.
– Amen. If you have a problem with this, there’s a guy at your table who would love to talk to

– [Congregation] Yes.
– “Anyone who does this is”? – Detestable.

– “Detestable “in the sight of the Lord your God.” Let me just say this. God looks down, He sees two groups of people. He wants to see male, female. What does He say? “Look like male, female. “Look like male, female.” God wants men to look like men and then act like men. He wants women to look like women and act like women. Is this bad? No, it’s different. I’ll just tell you this. I’m so glad grace doesn’t look like me. I got, I’m not complaining at all. Like if I woke up and looked at this, I’d throw up and go back to bed. “Like my life is over. “There’s no reason to continue.” But the point is this. God’s people do things differently. This is written all the way back in Deuteronomy by Moses. This is thousands of years ago. You know what that means? That’s what people were doing. Let you in on a little secret. When the Bible says don’t do something, it’s ’cause people are?

– [Congregation] Doing it.

– People are doing it. So all of a sudden we’re like, “Oh, let’s put on girls’ clothes.” And God’s like, “Oh geez, I’ve been dealing with this since Moses.” We think we’re so highly evolved. It’s like, “No, no.” And so ultimately what God is saying is, “Yeah, everybody else does things, “and then my people do things differently.” The word holy means different. As God’s men, we’re gonna do things different. Different. We’re gonna do sex different, marriage different, parenting different, money different, gender different, everything different. So just embrace this. You’re a weirdo, you’re a minority, you’re an outlier, you’re a freak, wear it proud, everyone else does.

– [Congregation] Yeah.

– That’s who you are. I mean we’re at the point now the only rebellion left is “Shut up, put your boots on, go to work, come home, “pay your bills.” Like, that’s the only rebellion left, nobody’s doing it.

– That’s great.

– Amen.

– Let me do another verse first. 1 Corinthians 6:9. This is in the King James. So for you old guys, here’s one for you. There you go. “I know ye not that the righteous shall not inherit “the kingdom of God.” So who’s not gonna make it into forever? “Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor adulterers, “nor?

– Effeminate men. “Effeminate men or abusers of themselves with mankind.” In the original Greek, the King James actually is, I think, the most accurate translation. God made you a man. He made you a man to act like?

-Aman. -Aman. -Aman.

– A man. And we’re gonna talk about what that is and isn’t. Because in our culture, it tends to be pushed, I’ll do it over to the left, pushed far to the left on confusion, but then men can overreact with chauvinism. And these are the guys who think that bullying and domineering, and intimidating women and children is a man. That’s not a man.

– Boo.

– That’s a terrible man. A good, godly man, blesses women and children. That’s what we’re saying. A good, godly man filled and led with the Holy Spirit, he’s not confused, he’s also not overbearing and domineering, he’s loving and present. His wife is like, “Oh man, ever since he met Jesus, “I actually like being married to him.” The kids are like, “My dad is actually a blessing and a benefit to my life.” That’s how we determine what a masculine man is. And then the last verse, 1 Corinthians 16:13 through 14, “Be alert, stand firm in the faith.” And let me say this, you’re gonna get attacked for what you believe, you’re just going to. “Act like” what?


– A man. “Be strong, your every action must be done with love.” So what He’s talking about here is He says, “Stand firm, be strong, act like a man,” that’s the lion. “Everything you do, done in love.” That’s the lamb. This is gonna be one of the themes that we thread through all of our times together. Jesus Christ is what a healthy man looks like. The good news for men that go, “What does our good man look like?” Well, actually there’s a God-man named Jesus, and if you wanna see what a perfect man looks like, just look at Jesus. And question. Do women feel safe around Jesus?

– [Congregation] Yes.

– How about the women that are used and abused by bad men? Like the woman caught an adultery, or the woman at the well, do they feel safe with Jesus?

– Yes.

– 100%. Children, do they seem to like Jesus? He can’t get rid of them. Everywhere He goes, the kids are following Him. They wanna hang out, they wanna play. I mean, He is beloved by children because He’s safe, and He’s loving, and He’s a lamb. And so it says in Revelation 5 that “Jesus is the lion of the tribe of Judah “and He is the lamb who is slain.” To be a man like Jesus, stand firm, be strong, act like a man.

– Yes.
– And let everything you do be done in love. – Love.

– It’s being a lion for women and children. It’s being a lamb with your woman and children. It’s knowing when to be tough, to stand up to those who would do evil, ’cause evil never stops itself. It must be stopped. And how to be tender, and loving, and safe, and gracious with those that God has called you to care for. And so that’s what we mean by acting like a man. If you’re only a lion, you’re gonna kill women and children. If you’re only a lamb, you’re gonna let somebody else kill women and children. The goal is, stop the bad guys but don’t be a bad guy, be a good guy. And what this means is, we study the life of Jesus and what it means to act like a man. It doesn’t mean that there are masculine and feminine emotions. I got a bunch of lectures to get into this. It means that men and women both bear the image and likeness of God, we have the same emotions, but we express them differently. Masculine and feminine ways. So I’ve got this in the book, “Spirit-Filled Jesus”. Jesus’ emotions are mentioned 60 times in the four gospels, Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. The emotions that are mentioned of Jesus says He has humor, Jesus has sense humor, He marveled, He was sorrowful, troubled, distressed, sad, angry, grieved. “He loved, He rejoiced, and He was glad.” Jesus had the full range of emotions, and He demonstrates them in a masculine way. Most men who are unhealthy think that there are feminine emotions, masculine emotions. So women say, they’re sorry, not men. Women cry, men don’t. Women are affectionate, men aren’t. No, no, no men and women both bear the image likes of God, men and women have the same emotions, they’re just expressed in masculine and feminine ways. Jesus is perfect and has the full range of emotions. The shortest verse in the whole Bible is, Jesus?

– Wept.

– Wept. He wept. Let me, I’ve got two daughters. My daughters know me as a lamb. They’ve seen me cry more than anybody. How many of you got a daughter? You’re like, it’s like kryptonite, I just, you know, I just melt. I love being a girl dad. I love it with all my heart. I dropped off our youngest daughter at college last week, moved her in, she’s got great roommate, she’s super excited, she’s doing great kid, kid number four, super excited for her. And then, it is time to go, and I went to pray for her. Guess what happened? I sprung a leak. That’s what happened. I’m just, it looked like I won miss America, like I am, I can’t stop crying. it’s the deep cry. Now I’ve got snot coming out, like I’m a hot mess minus the hot, you know. So

my daughter, she sees me, she just starts crying, she’s like, “I knew you were gonna cry, “and then you make me.” My daughters make me cry all the time. My heart is open to my daughters. I love them dearly. Every time, my daughter, one of my daughter is in the room, I kiss them on top of the head and I tell them I love them.” To act like a man is probably not to act like a man as you would see in the world, very confused and passive and feminine, or chauvinistic, domineering, overbearing machismo. We want men to be like, Jesus. And if you drink whiskey and eat meat, I’m fine with that, in fact, I’ll come to your house. But at the end of the day, I’d get an orangutan to drink whiskey and eat meat, so it must require more than that to be a man.

– [Congregation] That’s right.

– So when He says, “Be strong, stand firm, “act like men, tough. “Everything you do, love, tender, lion, lamb.” We wanna be men who bless women and children. When they’re with us, they feel like a lamb is for them, but if needed a lion will be there to protect them. So that being said, this is gonna open up a category later. I’m gonna get in trouble here, and then I’ll pick it up down the road. We don’t just raise, this is part of the brokenness in our culture, we don’t raise children, we raise sons and daughters.

– [Congregation] Amen. All these parenting books, and there are some commonalities in raising sons and daughters, but biologically, chemically, hormonally, they are male and female. How many of you have raised a son, and how many of you had a daughter first, and then you got a son? And you’re like, “Now I believe in evolution. “I think this guy’s too back on the chart.” It’s because until he gets a full testosterone bath and goes to a point of maturity, he is at risk of complete self-destruction all the time. There’s just things that are happening physically in his little masculine body that are very different than his sister. But then his sister gets her period, becomes a young woman, and as a dad, you’re like, “Whoa! “Help! Wife, please, now!” And what happens in your sons and daughters is, they are biologically, chemically, neurologically hardwired different. And so when you’re raising them, you need to raise them as sons and daughters. Here’s the language of the Bible. It speaks of men or a man, 4,000 times, a husband over a hundred times, wife over 400 times, a woman or women 600 times, sons 4,000 times, daughters 700 times. That’s just those words, including all the people that get named. God looks at the planet, here’s what He says. “Men, women, sons, daughters.” Part of the problem we have, we don’t know what a man is or does, so we don’t know how to take a little boy and grow him up to be a man. We don’t. And so ultimately when we get into the parenting portion of this, and the application of this, we are gonna talk about how to raise sons and daughters. And they’re different. And let me just tell you, you men are far more important than you think. You’re far more needed than you think. You’re far more powerful than you think. You’re far more vital than you think. You’re far more necessary than you think. Every single cultural crisis, and problem, and pain that we have is because men failed to do what God created them to do. And the only solution is not more government, but better men.

– [Congregation] Like God created them.

– So let me say this. If you guys will come back and commit to this class and this process, you’ll be honest around the table. You don’t need to be strong, you don’t need to be tough, you don’t need to be right, you just need to be honest. That’s why we call it “Real Men”. If we called it “Perfect Men”, Jesus would come and that’s it. Okay. We wanted to have a better turnout, so we called it “Real Men”. Wherever you’re at, let’s start there. Where are you at? Just like, “Here’s where I’m at.” “I don’t know, you know, I’ve got a wife, kids. “It’s going okay.” “Great. Okay, how do we help?” “I have a girlfriend, she’s pregnant. “I don’t think that’s right.” “No, you did the fire, aim, ready process. “We gotta figure that out with you.” You don’t need to pretend you got it all figured out. Just be honest, and the guys around you, and the table leads especially are some of the most incredible men, they’re here to help you. Where else are you gonna go? Where else are you gonna go? You can’t get a degree in this. There’s no class on this. Many of you, your father wasn’t there, and if he was what he said wasn’t helpful. The strip club will take your money. Sports bar will feed you wings, but who’s there to help? That being said, we’re here to help. And to help you figure out where you’re at, I put together a little male, female test. This will be fun. So here’s what I want you to do. Figure out where you’re at. We all start somewhere. We’re gonna figure out where you’re at. Give yourself a point for every question you get right. You ready to take the gender test?

– [Congregation] Yes.

– All right, here we go. Number one: who has up to 13 times more testosterone, male or female?

– Male.

– Male. You notice the voice was deep there. Who has more voice box cartilage and testosterone causing a deeper voice, male or female?

– Male.

– Male. Who has hairier bodies from androgen sex hormones?

– Male.

– Male. Who has curvier bodies, hips, breasts, and buttocks?

– Female.

– Female. Yep. And if that’s you, we apologize. We’ll lay hands and pray on you. You need healing, brother. You got a demon. Okay. Who has wider hips for birthing a child?

– Female.
– Female. Who can nurse a child with nourishment?

– Female.

– Female. Our culture’s so stupid, we talk about birthing people. Oh gosh, I tell you, don’t go on the internet. Who is stronger for hunting to provide for and fighting to protect the less strong?

– Male.

– Male. Who has thicker skin literally and denser stronger bones, tendons, and ligaments?

– Male.

– Male. Who needs more iron because of menstrual blood loss?

– [Congregation] I do.

– One, two, three, not it. Okay. Female. Who needs more food because they’re bigger, stronger and burn more calories?

– Male.

– Male. All right. Let score yourself one point for each. All right, total them up, here we go. Next slide please, or not.

– [Congregation] Male. Here we go. Okay. If you’re zero to two, you’ve been brainwashed and probably support transgender sports. We love you. There’s hope, but that’s where you’re starting, Jack. Three to five: you lack discernment and or drunk. And if you need a designated driver, just tell your table lead to get you home. Six through seven: if you got a six or seven, you’re morally blind in one eye. Eight or nine: you still have something wrong with you. 10: you’re the last hope for the planet and you deserve a stake. Amen. All right. That was fun for me. Here’s the big idea. God made us?

– Yeah.
– Male, female. Which are you? – Male.
– Male.

– That’s what we’re talking about. So here’s gonna be the coming lectures in the coming months. I’ll tell you where we’re going. Today, we dealt with “Man: Own Your Identity,” you’re a man. Next week, “Son: What Does it Mean to Worship your Father?” “Sage: How do You Learn Your

Lessons “and Grow in Wisdom?” “Worker: How Do You Do Your Job as a Man?” “Artist: How Do You create Culture as a Man?” And men have abandoned this space and it’s way on the left and it needs to get pulled toward the right. “Steward: How Do You Build This Kingdom, “Manage Resources? “Husband: How do You Love Your Princess?” “Father: How Do You Leave Your Legacy?” And “Warrior: How Do You Slay Your Dragon?” And that last one will be right before Thanksgiving. And we’re gonna have a special guest, John Lovell from the Warrior Poet’s Society is gonna join us for a special testimony to close out our time together there. You guys excited?

– [Congregation] Yes.

– This is step one in the beginning. So we’re gonna have time around tables in just a moment. I’ve got two questions for you. Who are you? How can we pray for you? I love you. I’m proud of you. We’re here for you. You matter, we care about you. I don’t care where you are, things can get better. And as soon as a man surrenders himself to his Father and wants to be a good son, the Father is very gracious to pour out blessing and to help that man. How do I know? I didn’t have this in my notes, but here’s what I’ll tell you. I was 17 years of age, in high school, grew up down the street from a few strip clubs near the Green River Killer and Ted Bundy. I did not know Jesus. I met a pastor’s daughter at 16, 17, 17 years of age, started sleeping with a pastor’s daughter. That’s where I started. And now she’s my wife, she’s teaching the women and I’m teaching the men what not to do ’cause that’s what we did. If there’s hope for me, there’s hope for you.

– [Congregation] There is.

– If you start in a bad place, we all start in a bad place. If you got it wrong, God can help you to make it right. All you’ve gotta do is just start by saying “You’re the Father, I’m the son. “Dad help me become like Your son.” That’s all we’re asking. The want to precedes the how to, and we’re gonna give you some time to encourage one another. These are your brothers. These are your friends. These are the guys that you can call for help. These are the people that you wanna have your wife be friends with their wife, your kids be friends with their kids, ’cause the whole world is against everything we believe. But we’re for one another, and God’s grace is for all of us. Father, thank you for an opportunity to teach, have a little bit of fun. God, thank You for a great launch, a full house. God, this is an incredible thing to see men, to see men coming together to be built up so that they can bless women and children. God thank You for the honor to love and to lead. Thank You for all the table leads. And thank You in advance for the generations of lives and legacies that You’re gonna change. And God, I pray that women would be blessed and that children would be blessed because of us. And God, I pray for all the guys who’ve been confused, they’ve been traumatized, they’ve been abused, they didn’t have a dad, something bad happened, they were poorly educated. God, we’re not angry with them, we’re concerned for them. We’re not here to beat them down, we’re here to build them up. God, we don’t expect them to pretend like everything is okay. But Holy Spirit, we ask you to come and to begin the process of making them okay in Jesus’ good name. Amen.

Mark Driscoll
[email protected]

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